Alright it's Day 11, I missed day 9 and 10. I saw the newest Harry Potter movie and was actually quite happy about it. I enjoyed the whole Snape scene, he has been my favorite character. Going to the gym is great, it makes me feel better and it's beneficial. Yay!
I've been doing better, which is good, thank god for friends. I've been hanging out with them and speaking to them on the phone, it helps keeps me sane. The more I talk to them the more freely they talk about "he who wont be named" and the more realizations they share with me. Why they didn't tell me this before is a surprise to me, but now it makes me wonder what else I was blind too..man.
I need to wash my car but am terrified to, because of the tinting. once Wednesday rolls around she'll get a wash and all the TLC I've been denying her in fear of the tinting. I did get my nails done Saturday, yellow and black like my car. I love the nail girl, she's better than a shrink. then had my eyebrows waxed, when you've had metal in your legs to keep your bones together pain feels different, I was barely fazed by the waxing, the lady was impressed, she was nice, quiet but alright. Now to decide if I'm going to get that blond chuck dyed in my hair...no idea yet. Still so excited for my friends wedding, he called me today to see how I was doing. Told him better I'm not crying still feeling nauseous but hopefully that will pass.
I hate this feeling of needing to throw up, I'm not really eating anymore, just when I'm with someone, other than that, I'm not hungry all. this sucks, 11 years and I have no idea what the hell just happened. sigh...
But i think after this school year I'm going to start applying to different jobs some outta state, I want to travel, do things for me and not feel so freaked out that anywhere I go I might run into "he who shall not be named"
But i have deadlines and a portfolio to redo, and thank god a supportive family and group of friends who will simply put up with me.
taking it day by day and realizing Gloria Gaynor "I will survive" is good advice.
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